Day 2: Dr. Rick Hanson – Daily Challenge: Feel Cared About 2018-05-18T00:04:05+00:00

Day 2: Heart

Daily Challenge: Feel Cared About

Dr. Rick Hanson

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What You’ll Learn

Tune into the body and be mindful of feeling alright, right now

About Dr. Rick Hanson

Rick Hanson, Ph.D., is a psychologist, Senior Fellow of the Greater Good Science Center at UC Berkeley, and New York Times best-selling author. His books are available in 26 languages and include Hardwiring Happiness, Buddha’s Brain, Just One Thing, and Mother Nurture. He edits the Wise Brain Bulletin and has numerous audio programs. A summa cum laude graduate of UCLA and founder of the Wellspring Institute for Neuroscience and Contemplative Wisdom, he’s been an invited speaker at NASA, Oxford, Stanford, Harvard, and other major universities, and taught in meditation centers worldwide. His work has been featured on the BBC, CBS, and NPR, and he offers the free Just One Thing newsletter with over 120,000 subscribers, plus the online Foundations of Well-Being program in positive neuroplasticity that anyone with financial need can do for free.

To learn more about Dr. Rick Hanson check out his personal website as well as The Foundations of Well Being to explore how to shape your brain for lasting well-being. To check out his new book, Resilient: How to Grow an Unshakable Core of Calm, Strength, and Happiness, click here.

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57 Comments

  1. Tim Penhale May 15, 2018 at 10:29 am - Reply

    Once I found inner joy, my teacher told me this is a step to mental freedom. This gave me so much encouragement to continue, what a wonderful way to live

  2. Sandi May 15, 2018 at 10:35 am - Reply

    A beautiful exercise

    • Norm May 16, 2018 at 1:51 pm - Reply

      One of your best pieces, Rick! Thanks

  3. Lina May 15, 2018 at 10:36 am - Reply

    Great exercise. Thank you

  4. Senem May 15, 2018 at 10:49 am - Reply

    Thank you so much.

  5. Claire May 15, 2018 at 10:55 am - Reply

    This was most difficult for me in that it brought up all of the ways in which I don’t feel loved or cared about both in the present day and in my childhood. Very painful. I kept trying to imagine what it would feel like to be cared about but it brought tears and emptiness. Is that why I wanted to imagine God loves me if no one else does?

    • Nicki May 16, 2018 at 6:03 am - Reply

      Sending you some love Claire x

    • Greer May 17, 2018 at 12:34 pm - Reply

      My experience too Claire. IIt came as a bit of a shock that I felt so unappreciated ….. I will keep practicing! Sending you love Greer x

  6. Nancy May 15, 2018 at 11:06 am - Reply

    For one dealing with PTSD, a very difficult exercise but one I see value in and will spend my day with

  7. Suzie LeBlanc May 15, 2018 at 11:15 am - Reply

    A helpful reminder of daily gifts which can help us feel cared for. Thank you.

  8. nance May 15, 2018 at 11:28 am - Reply

    I’d really appreciate it if you’d put the audio recording in a written transcript. particularly the challenges. I have limited data use on the internet. So I acnnot do much streaming at all. Anyone who isn’t flush with money or paying cable out of their food budget is likely to have the same problem. I listened to aprts of yesterday’s program by streaming a few minutes then skipping to later and streaming a few more. That’s not an optimal way to do this.

    thank you. nance

  9. Dez May 15, 2018 at 11:29 am - Reply

    Gratitude. I realize I’ve been so stuck on seeing all the ways I was abused and neglected, that I haven’t allowed myself to open up to these blessings being poured out on me every day. May I have the courage and discipline to practice this every day so I can open up to all the beauty happening in this present moment.

  10. Neet May 15, 2018 at 11:43 am - Reply

    Beautiful to feel loved, appreciated, cared for, thank you for allowing me to bring to mind so many happy memories, as you said, some bitter-sweet from someone so dear who is no longer here. Thank you 😊

  11. Michele May 15, 2018 at 11:56 am - Reply

    Really beginning the work of choosing what to rest out attention on. Great!

  12. S. Perez May 15, 2018 at 12:59 pm - Reply

    I feel fourtunated. Remembering mi past I had the opportunity to feel loved. I am motivated to love others today.

  13. Sophie Roure May 15, 2018 at 1:15 pm - Reply

    Thank you Rick. Just made me realised how we take for granted others affection and kindness.. For example, I will pay more attention to my children and my dog giving and getting a hug, I definitely feel so much peace and love in practicing that 🙂

  14. Nancy May 15, 2018 at 1:18 pm - Reply

    So very difficult. I realize how thoroughly I am habituated to retain the negative or create my own negative. So I am reminded to reach out to a friend I missed seeing yesterday to make sure she is OK and just say hi. Instinctively, I feel that my caring isn’t worth much. I need to do it anyway and be open to the possibility that it is worth quite a lot.

  15. Kevin J, Waters May 15, 2018 at 1:22 pm - Reply

    I sometimes need to be reminded to practice loving kindness toward myself, &, remember when I have experienced those feelings, being Mindful of self…..

  16. SuzNne May 15, 2018 at 1:24 pm - Reply

    I think these are wonderful suggestions if you live around people. I live a fairly solitary life so it would be interesting to see some ideas that are not dependent on outside sources for feeling cared for. Thank you for sharing your wisdom and perspectives

  17. ligia May 15, 2018 at 2:08 pm - Reply

    i was in tears because i realized i could’t remember the feeling of being loved ou liked . i think i din’t pay atention to that moments when they occur. today is a good start point to be mindful of feeld cared about ! ! ! thank you ! ! !

  18. Evelyn May 15, 2018 at 2:28 pm - Reply

    I feel gratful that I was able to tap into in some way all these ways to feel cared about and how I care about them

  19. Ed May 15, 2018 at 2:45 pm - Reply

    Thank you, Rick. The world is a better place because of you. Definitely MY world is.

    • Regina May 15, 2018 at 11:39 pm - Reply

      ❤️

  20. Paul May 15, 2018 at 3:19 pm - Reply

    Amazing to feel loved, appreciated, cared for, thank you for allowing me to bring to mind so many happy memories.

  21. Lori May 15, 2018 at 3:21 pm - Reply

    This Daily Challenge was in fact quite challenging. It rather evoked depression instead of uplifting my spirits. I could not conjure up any experiences that made me feel loved, included, validated, respected, etc. But I deal with depression in my life, so this type of practice will always be a hurdle for me. I thank you for helping me create this awareness and I will try to focus on those times that I am feeling cared about instead of not belonging.

  22. Geri deGruy May 15, 2018 at 3:28 pm - Reply

    Thank you. There are so many ways we can recognize caring that just whiz past us in a busy day. Thanks for slowing me down to see this.

  23. Kevin May 15, 2018 at 3:29 pm - Reply

    Yesterday, I spent the day with an old friend. She was my best friend. It had been 16 years since we had seen each other. And in our time together yesterday, it felt almost as if no time had passed. I mention this because many of my memories in today’s challenge brought back memories of her, our friendship and the beautiful times together in the distant past. I felt also all five of these cared for feelings from her yesterday. I hope she felt them too.
    Fantastic exercise today not only to feel cared for, but also to feel gratitude for being cared about.

  24. MK May 15, 2018 at 4:17 pm - Reply

    Thank you, once again, for challenging me beyond measure. I greatly appreciate your opening explanation about the possibility of wandering to times I was not accepted. Of course I quickly went there, but it was comforting to know that this is ‘normal’, and by extension that I was not the only one who wasn’t getting it. What a trickster my mind is… running in horror from what I yearn for. I will return to this again today. Thank you for sharing your wisdom.

  25. Eve May 15, 2018 at 4:58 pm - Reply

    Thank you for this beautiful reminder. I am usually more focused on either my solitude or on appreciating/loving/seeing others. What a beautiful thing to focus on how much we receive constantly… Thank you!

  26. Lynn Steinhauer May 15, 2018 at 5:02 pm - Reply

    That was really eye-opening.

    Thank you

  27. John May 15, 2018 at 6:49 pm - Reply

    Wonderful experience, and a surprisingly difficult challenge — to let our ego-sense of worthiness go, and yet love ourselves…

  28. Anne May 15, 2018 at 7:10 pm - Reply

    I feel great and cared about

    Thank you Rick

  29. Deborah Kawkeka May 15, 2018 at 7:47 pm - Reply

    This exercise is so valuable. I feel peaceful.

  30. Edgar May 15, 2018 at 8:46 pm - Reply

    I feel light. Thank you.

  31. Annemarie Kleinheerenbrink May 15, 2018 at 8:59 pm - Reply

    This exercise gave me a big smile for quite a long time. There were several moments today i was feeling cared about, included or loved. It made me conscious, happy, grateful and opened my heart. i now realise there are moments of being cared for everyday, i just have to focus on these moments. Thank for this change of view.

  32. Terry May 15, 2018 at 9:12 pm - Reply

    That was great! I am so often alone.
    This exercise brought to the foreground of my awareness and my feelings, how much caring and love there actually is in my life, even though I feel,so often alone in the world. It surprised me. It made me feel warm. It made me smile. Thank You

  33. Sarah Patrick May 16, 2018 at 12:22 am - Reply

    Today’s topic could not be more timely and probe me to explore further, for so many reasons. I unearthed an incredible and selfless act done on my behalf by my nephew, who has always been close to me since I witnessed his birth while i was in high school. It is on the heels of learning my first ‘relationship’ in 30 years was with a fictitious imagining (catfish) and while celebrating a one year new job anniversary and 3 yr contract extention with a group where 98% love me and 2% want to eliminate me so they or their friend/husband can take my job. I will have to reflect on this some more!

  34. Robyn May 16, 2018 at 12:59 am - Reply

    Thank you so much for helping me become aware of the love, respect, empathy, inclusion and friendship in my life. I am seldom aware of it, or should I say “mindful” of the existence of so much support available to me.

  35. Lorna May 16, 2018 at 2:22 am - Reply

    I join some of the others who commented on the difficulties of feeling loved when it seems very improbable. I feel like Lori who responded that the exercise “evoked depression.” My feeling right now is that the exercise was presented in an upbeat way that excluded those of us who struggle daily with their value to others.

  36. Jana May 16, 2018 at 2:30 am - Reply

    Really made me feel fortunate that I have many people that care about me. Also, gave me desire to do more for others for their needs of feeling cared for. Thanks so much. Good nuggets!

  37. Diana May 16, 2018 at 3:48 am - Reply

    This exercise helped me to recognize that I have a difficult time appreciating all of the positive feedback in my daily life, because I do not trust all of it to be genuinely felt by those who express their appreciation and love without needing something from me. Maybe I need to take a leap of faith every time I experience this, and learn to trust more.

  38. Elizabeth Thomson May 16, 2018 at 4:01 am - Reply

    Happy Day. This exercise and my experience has left me knowing that I am cared about, so much! This is a very important and beautiful gift. Thank you.

  39. Sigrid Lamken May 16, 2018 at 5:47 am - Reply

    Many seem to feel like there is nobody who cares about them, and first I found this practice very challenging too…but I realized that for example being part of this community is a way of belonging. Ot that the way Dr. Hanson is talking to me…not me personally, but as part of a group he directs his words to,…is caring and loving. So even if you are isolated and depressive, there are opportunities. You can even try to care about yourself and cherish that feeling. For me it was a very wholesome experience NOT to focus on my usual feeling of loneliness, isolation, and being unwanted.

  40. Arche.N. May 16, 2018 at 5:48 am - Reply

    I have high respect for Rick Hanson but there was no audio on this YouTube video. YouTube has somehow zapped my ability to receive sound ever since I tried to access a video telling the background behind #QAnon. (I can hear other sites and audio/video files on my computer hard drive–so the problem is not the sound card as far as I can tell.) Just a heads-up for you about YouTube…

    More power to you anyway, Dr. Hanson!

  41. julie May 16, 2018 at 7:10 am - Reply

    Thank you so much for this. I found my attention wandering and as Dr. Hanson suggested, my mind seemed to naturally gravitate to upsetting memories so I appreciated the reminder that this is a normal human experience, persevered and returned to sourcing happier memories. I will practice this exercise as while my concentration was scattered and my recall fleeting, I can see how enormously beneficial this exercise is. Feeling so grateful.

  42. Kazi Nasrin Siddiqa May 16, 2018 at 5:47 pm - Reply

    Your wonderful words helped me to open my mind and to observe closely that how much cared I am. I am surrounded by love and care and how blessed we are!

  43. Latha Hapugoda May 16, 2018 at 6:16 pm - Reply

    Dear Rick, Really appreciate this practice which trained my mind to appreciate how much I am cared, appreciated and loved. It made me feel so happy, content & so grateful to you for making me realise this. Rick, you inspire minds hearts and lives and you are a tower of compassion and generosity. May you continue to have the strength to continue the noble teaching to make this world a happier place to live. I also wish to send my love to some colleagues who found the exercise a bit challenging, You can now appreciate there are people who care for you! 🙂

  44. Lorna May 16, 2018 at 6:18 pm - Reply

    Thank you, Sigrid, for your thoughtful response to “those who seem to feel like nobody cares about them.” You presented a helpful suggestion to take into account that “being part of this community is a way of belonging.” I agree with you and appreciate that you addressed an approach that resonates with me and hopefully with others who felt at a loss with this exercise. You’ve given me hope.

  45. Nicki May 16, 2018 at 7:16 pm - Reply

    This has been very difficult today, it’s only in recent years that I’ve felt a connection to others and today for some reason I’ve missed the point and only on reflection recognised that there is an underlying connection there. For example some family members suggested meeting up this weekend and were prepared to change their plans to include me. I immediately started throwing up excuses until the penny dropped that this was a kind and friendly offer. Difficult. xx

  46. Ria Tanz Kubota May 16, 2018 at 7:56 pm - Reply

    Beautiful, timely, and extremely helpful. This issue has really been up in suddenly being unable to drive any more and finding the people who declared they’d be happy to take me shopping or to the doctor, weren’t. Shook my sense of self to be more alone, need more help, and not have it. This reversed the spiral and brought back gratitude, reframing the whole concept of being cared about. The guided meditation on evidence of being cared about brought back the sensations and emotions of having care and allows me to focus on the evidence of care, not disappointment. Thank you!

  47. Leah May 16, 2018 at 9:51 pm - Reply

    My heart goes out to the others who, like me, feel alone. I have done this practice before and it can be quite challenging. I do feel that paying attention to even the smallest opportunities to feel cared about (friendly exchange with a cashier, a smile from someone walking by) can “prime the pump” for feeling connected. However, it can be hard to remember to do this and sometimes the very smallness of the available opportunities brings up sadness and a sense of scarcity. I find directing care towards myself or imagining a loving being often feels better. One thing I try during these summits is feeling grateful to, and cared for by, the presenters as they share their time and teachings with me. Most seem warm and kind and I try to notice that in their faces and voices as I watch.

  48. Fionnuala Brennan May 17, 2018 at 7:49 am - Reply

    I love the invitation to let the feeling of being liked, loved, appreciated spread in your body. I felt a warm wave all around my heart, a wave that was spreading out into an ocean of love which included all those who llike, love me and those who may not. or who may not feel loved themselves. Thank you Rick for your loving presence.

  49. Putter May 17, 2018 at 8:54 am - Reply

    Such a simple exercise, and yet it illuminated so much that I’m normally unconscious of (and even resist!).
    Thank you, Rick!

  50. Jannp May 17, 2018 at 1:03 pm - Reply

    Wonderful list. I like the use of this being food for the heart. Thank you 😊 💕

  51. Tawaka May 17, 2018 at 2:00 pm - Reply

    ,Like some others here I found this meditation challenging but rewarding. I cried through the exercise because of my sad neglected childhood leading into most of my adult life. Because of the selfish, unkind, uncaring experiences that adults taught me in childhood, I built walls around myself to protect from any future hurt. But the walls keep out positive energy too. This week I want to work on letting go of fear, opening the door to my heart, and giving & recieving kindness.

  52. Jessica May 17, 2018 at 4:16 pm - Reply

    Thank you so much. This has been an emotional week of goodbyes, of caring for my son’s feelings, of recognition given to me by a community and just so emotional. This mindfulness challenge could not have come at a better time. My heart feels better, and full of love now. Thank you.

  53. ANNA May 20, 2018 at 7:15 pm - Reply

    Day 2, Rich HANSON LEFT ME SAD, I FEEL TOO MUCH EMPATHY WHICH OFTEN MAKES ME FEEL HELPLESS. MANY SAD PEOPLE EVERYWHERE.

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